Me a Masterpiece?

Most of my life I have focused on the things in which I am not. My flaws and the things that I lack that the other girls do not. I am not talking about my body, I am talking more about self esteem and a sense of being a real women. Confidence of beauty (within), comfort in my own body(who I am), the ability to be in a room surrounded by other women and not feel completely out of place. So I lived the best I could in trying to compensate in various ways. I got along with everyone, eager to please....I strived to be a good daughter and friend. I never stopped until I achieved every goal that I started. And to do the absolute best of my ability, and I never took it very well if my ability was just NOT good enough to cut it. But looking back I notice that underlining all that I lack was the gnawing feeling that I will never really be anyone special, or valuable to anyone else. This feeling affected everything I did. More importantly, I think it affected the way I viewed God. I do not think I ever viewed Him inside as making everything PERFECT.....after all ....He did make me. And the more I heard how loving God really was, the more I looked at myself as if I had committed some sin that I felt had disqualified me for a life of that value and purpose that God had for everyone else.

Since then I have gotten to know my Father God and how He does not make mistakes. How He is the true forgiving substance in my life that washes out the thoughts of being worthless. Maybe the things in which I always thought were flaws, were just the framing for the work of art that He is making in my life....the masterpiece, no less, that He wants to create in me. I was fearfully and wonderfully made..... You know that every TRUE artist likes to choose the frame that best displays his work! It was not a mistake that I am the way I am. If God wanted me to fit in with other women, or walk , talk, act, or look a certain way, He would have made me that way.

We all need to look at ourselves this way. We are the canvas on which He wants to display beauty, and the kind of person we are is the perfect frame for the Artist's work.

Accepting this, well.........working on accepting this concept means I have to look at myself in an entirely new way, and that is not easy, particularly because I have been trying to not notice the things that I dislike about who I am for so long. Now I need to try to embrace who I am and truly discover who God made me to be. So I am now trying to shift my perspective until I can look at myself from God's viewpoint. Sometimes God has a funny way of letting me know how He sees me, and I have to say......I get surprised by what he sees. My vision of His view is still not very clear. :-)

It is so neat to know that He can take the broken pieces of any life and create out of them a work of art that will bring glory to Him and blessings to others. He can take even the wounds dealt to you by both circumstances and others and use them for His glory. I just need to put myself in God's hands, then I know that nothing can keep Him from turning my life into the beautiful creation He always intended it to be.

"Lord, Help me see myself as you see me........so that you are able to reveal Your power, glory, love and even "creativity" in this world through me. :-)Help me to not get in the way of your work in me. Forgive me for ever thinking that maybe I was not some of your best work. Forgive me for not always believing that I could live as a masterpiece through the blood of your son Jesus Christ. In your Holy name I pray these things~ Amen"

2 Corinthians 12:7-10