Who am I?

I do not always know who I am, but I know who I am suppose to be. I get lost in my every day life sometimes. I know who I am to so many people. I have to live up to that person, then at the end of the day sometimes I wonder.....am I a fraud?

Who am I really? If who I am is not really what others see and I am not sure of who I am to me, then who in the world am I? If I have to TRY to be the person that they want to see, then that cant really be me, can it?

But if I really want to be all that they want me to be, then that is "just me", isn't it?

I am not real open but I am not real shy, I am confident in front of them, but asking myself these questions in the silence of my room, is this low self esteem? Am I confused? I think that I am.

It is one thing to hold secrets from the rest of the world, being afraid of exposure, or simply fear of having to explain for yourself or anyone else... but what kind of person holds secrets even from themselves? Am I afraid of MYSELF or what I may think? Am I that mixed up sometimes that I don't think that "I" really know what "I" am keeping from ME? Will I ever be free? Is it that you really do not want to know who you really are? ..... you do not want to be justified do you?

Lord, only you see all of me, everything I am..... there has got to be a breakthrough within myself so that I can unleash who I am. I want to be MORE for YOU. I am feeling a little shadowed in my own identity. I know who I am in you, but I really feel like I need to unlock who I am inside, who you made me to be.... I am feeling myself start to unravel.... I am a little scared.... what will happen to me if I start being honest to myself, so that I can be true to who I am. Ok, maybe I am a lot scared. Actually, I don't think I want to talk about this anymore..... I am not ready.

Maybe, you could just take this from me as I sleep tonight.... ???? Maybe?